Note: the quotes in this article are fictional.
1. William Byron — Byron won Stage 1 and finished second in the Hollywood Casino 400.
"I chased Ross Chastain over the closing laps," Byron said. "I wasn't able to catch him, so I apologize to my team, my fans, and that watermelon that was murdered."
2. Alex Bowman — Bowman won Stage 2 and finished sixth in the Hollywood Casino 400.
"I'm just glad to have a solid finish in the first race of the Round of 12," Bowman said. "What do you do in a Hollywood Casino? You shoot craps. What is a playoff race at Talladega? A crap shoot."
3. Ross Chastain — Chastain led 52 laps and held off William Byron down the stretch to win the Hollywood Casino 400.
"Of course I'm not a playoff driver," Chastain said, "and that takes a little bit off the luster of a race win. That's why the sound of a watermelon going 'splat' is basically the same sound of my championship hopes crashing a few weeks ago."
4. Christopher Bell — Bell started on the pole and finished seventh in the Hollywood Casino 400.
"I tapped the wall towards the ends of both Stage 1 and Stage 2," Bell said. "I've heard somewhere that doing that is called a 'double-tap.' 'Double-tapping' is a good way not to win a race. Another 'double-tap' is starting on the pole, leading the most laps, and still not winning."
5. Kyle Larson — Larson blew a tire and hit the wall on lap 20, all but ending his chances for the win. Larson recovered to score a 26th-place finish.
"I was nowhere near as strong as I was at Bristol," Larson said. "At Bristol, I was on another planet, which is also where Hendrick wanted to send me back in 2020."
6. Denny Hamlin — A loose wheel midway through the race derailed Hamlin's hopes for a win at Kansas. But the No. 11 team battled back to grab an eighth-place finish.
"I think we're gonna be a little smarter about our race strategy at Talladega," Hamlin said. "By 'a little smarter,' I mean 'have one.'"
7. Ryan Blaney — Blaney produced his best drive of the playoffs with a fourth at Kansas.
"I feel like I'm peaking at the right time," Blaney said. "A few weeks ago, Tyler Reddick was puking at the wrong time."
8. Joey Logano — Logano finished 14th in the Hollywood Casino 400.
"I wouldn't want to be the guy that wrecked Kyle Busch while he was leading a race," Logano said. "No other driver wants to get on Kyle's bad side, but it's virtually impossible, because that's the only side Kyle has."
9. Chase Elliott — Elliott battled long odds to salvage a ninth-place finish at Kansas.
"I had to start at the rear after my No. 9 Chevy developed engine issues in practice," Elliott said. "That's certainly not the way you want to start the Round Of 12. That was really the 'Worst Chase Scenario.'"
10. Tyler Reddick — Reddick struggled to a 25th at Kansas.
"Michael Jordan was really excited," Reddick said, "to see the 'Bet MGM' logo on Kyle Busch's car. Usually, when Michael sees that logo on a car, it's the courtesy shuttle taking him to the casino."
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