Note: the quotes in this article are fictional.
1. Chase Elliott — Eliott dominated early at Road America, but couldn't overcome Tyler Reddick's late surge and had to settle for 2nd.
"Reddick just had too much for me there at the end in that No. 8 3CHI Chevy," Elliott said. "Fittingly enough, he 'smoked' me."
2. Ross Chastain — Chastain finished 4th at Road America, posting his Cup-series best 7th top-five of the year.
"I thought I drove a great race," Chastain said. "One, because I finished 4th, and two, because I didn't get lectured by some veterans after the race."
3. Ryan Blaney — Blaney won Stage 2, led 4 laps, and finished 11th in the QwikTrip 250.
"Tyler Reddick was pretty darn excited to get his first Cup win and qualify for the postseason," Blaney said. "I mean, maybe too excited. Heck, I think he started hyperventilating. I said, 'Dude, take deep breaths.' Then I thought, 'He's got '3CHI' on his car.' So then I said, 'Dude, inhale.'"
4. Kyle Larson — Larson finished a distant 3rd at Road America, as Tyler Reddick dominated late to win his way into the post-season.
"Congratulations to Tyler on such a huge win," Larson said. "As the driver of the 3CHI Chevrolet, he'll probably remember his first Cup victory with a 'bowl.'"
5. Joey Logano — Logano finished 27th at Road America.
"I've had a pretty crappy year on road courses," Logano said. "I've tried so hard to improve my driving on circuits, but apparently, I'm not making any progress. In other words, it looks like, ironically, I'm 'going in circles.'"
6. Kyle Busch — Busch posted a disappointing 29th-place finish at Road America, finishing as the last car on the lead lap.
"'Road America' is such a fitting name for a race venue on July 4th weekend," Busch said. "Chode America' is such a fitting name for me."
7. Kevin Harvick — Harvick finished 10th in the Qwik Trip 250 as Tyler Reddick won to become the 13th driver to clinch a playoff spot via a win.
"Reddick's win knocked me out of playoff position," Harvick said. "And judging by the lack of driver confrontations this season, it might be the only 'knock out' we'll see this year."
8. Martin Truex, Jr. — Truex finished 13th at Road America, posting Toyota's best finish on the day.
"It was just a sad day for Toyota overall," Truex said. "But congratulations to Tyler Reddick. If you're handing out grades, he gets an A-plus. And speaking of the '3CHI' car advertising CBD oil, among other things, Toyota's grade for the race was not a 'C,' nor a 'B,' nor a 'D,' but an 'F.'"
9. Daniel Suarez — Suarez came home 5th at Road America
"I know the elation Reddick feels," Suarez said. "I too got my first cup win on a road course. And I know I couldn't have done it without my team. So I, much like Reddick in his No. 8 3CHI Chevrolet, know it was a 'joint' effort.'"
10. Tyler Reddick — Reddick pulled away from Chase Elliott in the closing laps to win the QwikTrip 250 at Road America. The win put Reddick in the playoff field.
"My No. 8 car was dialed in," Reddick said. "The 3CHI Chevrolet was fast; you could even say it was 'blazing.' Now, my confidence is through the roof. In fact, it's growing like a weed."
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