Note: the quotes in this article are fictional.
1. Kevin Harvick — Harvick started on the pole at Daytona and finished 17th after an early spin and contact left his back in the field.
"I was the first car to the new chicane," Harvick said. "Let me be the first to tell you, facing a chicane you've never seen before ain't easy. In fact, it's a 'hard left.'"
2. Denny Hamlin — Hamlin finished 2nd in the Gobowling.com 235 at Daytona Road Course.
"That's my third runner-up finish in the last four races," Hamlin said. "If someone told you that I'm sick of coming up short, I would 'second' that emotion."
3. Chase Elliott — Elliott held off Denny Hamlin over the closing laps to capture the win at Daytona's road course.
"The race was called the 'GoBowling.com 235,'" Elliott said. "And Hooters is one of my major sponsors. If it hasn't already been done, then I'll take credit for the first 'nice rack' reference."
4. Joey Logano — Logano finished 9th at Daytona.
"The new chicane at Daytona caused a lot of worry beforehand," Logano said, "but it was mostly a non-factor. That wasn't the case in the Xfinity Series race on Saturday, when several drivers braked late and ran off track. It was definitely a 'turn for the worse' in that race."
5. Brad Keselowski — Keselowski finished 13th at Daytona on a lackluster day for Penske Racing.
"Some drivers thrive on road courses," Keselowski said. "Like Chase Elliott. He's a 'road warrior.' Me? Road courses make me anxious. So I'm a 'road worrier.'"
6. Martin Truex, Jr. — Truex was a factor all day and came home 3rd at Daytona's road course. He is 7th in the points standings.
"I really hurt my chances when I got caught speeding on pit lane," Truex said. "So, I shot myself in the foot. Fortunately, it didn't do any damage, because I have a lead foot."
7. Ryan Blaney — Blaney struggled at Daytona's road course, finishing 31st, his second consecutive finish outside the top 30.
"We raced Daytona's road course without the benefit of practice," Blaney said. "That's all anyone talked about before the race, and it got a little monotonous. Even Allen Iverson couldn't believe we were talking 'bout practice."
8. Aric Almirola — Almirola started sixth and finished 24th in the GoBowling.com 235.
"I wasn't at my best," Almirola said. "Heck, even a guy named 'Kaz Grala' finished 7th at Daytona. I thought 'Kaz Grala' was an Israeli self-defense discipline. If I would have known at the start I'd finish 31st, I would have submitted right then."
9. Kurt Busch — Busch finished 14th at Daytona.
"The bigger story is my brother Kyle," Busch said. "He finished 37th after brake and tire issues forced him out of the race. That's called a 'DNF.' It's been a frustrating year for Kyle, so that 'DNF' could also signify that he 'Did Ndeed say 'F.'"
10. Clint Bowyer — Bowyer finished 6th at Daytona's road course, posting his first top-10 since Pocono in late June.
"I'm winless this season," Bowyer said. "But I'm 11th in the points standings. So, as far as making the championship round, I like my chances. As far as winning the Cup championship, I like my chances in hell."
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