Note: the quotes in this article are fictional.
1. Kyle Busch — Busch held off Kevin Harvick down the stretch to win the GoBowling,com 400 at Kansas. Busch is second in the Sprint Cup points standings, four behind Harvick.
"Harvick got right on my bumper," Busch said, "and I thought for sure he'd bump me to get by. But he didn't. Of course, everybody, Landon Cassill included, that Harvick is a man of great integrity. He would never wreck someone just so he could win a race. He would, however, wreck someone just so he could advance to the next round of the Chase."
2. Kevin Harvick — Harvick was strong late at Kansas and nearly overtook Kyle Busch for the lead, but ultimately settled for second. Harvick
"I hit a piece of debris and damaged the splitter," Harvick said. "Otherwise, I would have passed Busch easily. So, you could say that 'piece of trash' won."
3. Carl Edwards — Edwards tagged the wall early in the GoBowling.com 400, causing a flat tire that ultimately cost him two laps. But the No. 19 Stanley Tools team recovered to finish 11th. Edwards is third in the points standings, 23 out of first.
"I indeed hit the wall," Edwards said, "but the damage was not severe. That's a testament to the great engineering that goes into making these walls safe. So, while I can't expect Kyle Busch to be, I can certainly expect walls to be 'forgiving.'"
4. Brad Keselowski — Keselowski took 10th at Kansas, surviving a spin win 26 laps to go to post his sixth top-10 finish of the year.
"I got loose racing with Denny Hamlin," Keselowski said. "Interestingly enough, there was no contact between us. That's certainly not the first time Hamlin and I have looked at each other 'sideways.'"
5. Jimmie Johnson — Johnson finished 17th at Kansas, his day sidetracked by a late pit road speeding penalty that coast him crucial track position.
"Track position was everything at Kansas," Johnson said. "If you didn't already know, 'track position' is NASCAR code for 'it's impossible to pass.' That's why you saw so many pit road speeding penalties. That's where the action is. And that's why, when you ask a driver about racing at Kansas, they always say, 'It's the pits.'"
6. Kurt Busch — Busch finished third in the GoBowling.com 400, recording his third top-five result of the year.
"Kansas Motor Speedway had a special booth set up where fans could buy a bowling ball and have finger holes drilled to their exact specifications," Busch said. "They also had televisions broadcasting the race so fans wouldn't miss a single minute. So, if you asked anyone what was going on in that booth or the race track, they'd tell you the same thing: 'It's boring.'"
7. Joey Logano — Logano slammed into Denny Hamlin's No. 11 Toyota after Hamlin and Brad Keselowski got loose in a lap 221 incident. The wreck sent the No. 22 Penske Ford to the garage, and Logano finished 38th.
"Matt Kenseth and I spoke before the Kansas race," Logano said, "and came to some sort of mutual understanding about our past issues. But it's a tenuous peace treaty. We weren't quite ready to shake hands, so instead we just shook fists."
8. Dale Earnhardt, Jr. — Earnhardt finished 15th at Kansas on a tough day for Hendrick Motorsports, which placed only one car in the top 10.
"My stepmother Teresa and my brother Kerry are locked in a court dispute over the use of the 'Earnhardt' name," Earnhardt said. "I'm surprised Teresa didn't have a problem with a race sponsored by bowling, because she thinks the use of '3' fingers is an infringement upon the name."
9. Chase Elliott — Elliott recorded the best finish among Hendrick Motorsports drivers with a ninth in the GoBowling.com 400.
"I may not have the Cup titles of Jimmie Johnson," Elliott said, "or the popularity of Dale Earnhardt, Jr., or the wasted potential of Kasey Kahne. What I do have is a legendary pedigree and an iconic car number. So, unlike some other young drivers trying to make an impact in this sport, I don't have to worry about making a name or a number for myself."
10. Austin Dillon — Dillon finished sixth at Kansas, posting his sixth top-10 of the year.
"My No. 3 RCR Chevy was fast," Dillon said. "My teammate Ryan Newman finished seventh. That means RCR put two cars in the top 10. Could we ever put three cars in the 'top 10?' Only if Paul Menard drops 20 digits from his car number."
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