Slant Pattern’s 2010 World Cup Preview

It's that time of the decade, where half of you (Americans) will take an interest in soccer for three weeks and then put it to bed for four years, and the other half will revel in your prideful ignorance. This preview is for the former.

GROUP A PREDICTED ORDER OF FINISH

URUGUAY
MEXICO
FRANCE
SOUTH AFRICA

This is a tough group to call because none of them are playing spectacular. Mexico was struggling enough in qualification to fire their coach in the middle of it, France only barely and controversially qualified, and recently lost to Nigeria. Uruguay had to win a play-in series against Costa Rica to get in. South Africa is home, of course, but they are reeling, failing to even qualify for the 16-team 2010 African Cup of Nations.

Uruguay's present form is the best, having recently hammered Switzerland in Switzerland, and a blowout over Israel is well. Mexico is once again coached by a Mexican and always seem to make it into the second round.

GROUP B PREDICTED ORDER OF FINISH

NIGERIA
SOUTH KOREA
ARGENTINA
GREECE

This is another group where the ones from the less heralded continents are playing better right now. Nigeria has that win over France, and South Korea won comfortably in their rival's (Japan) den. Greece just drew with North Korea, the consensus worst team in this tournament, and Argentina, so used to being 1-2 (in any order) with Brazil, limped into the World Cup fourth in qualifying. Diego Maradona as coach just seems like a distraction.

GROUP C PREDICTED ORDER OF FINISH

ENGLAND
SLOVENIA
USA
ALGERIA

I want the USA to win it all, of course, but it just seems to easy for this team to slip against teams they are fairly evenly matched with, or slightly better than. Algeria, like France, only barely and controversially qualified. Slovenia upset a tough Russian team, not to mention Poland and Czech Republic in the group stage, to qualify. England should cruise.

GROUP D PREDICTED ORDER OF FINISH

GERMANY
SERBIA
AUSTRALIA
GHANA

Germany could win this group with their "B" team. Serbia and Australia should be neck and neck for runner-up, with Ghana just a step behind.

GROUP E PREDICTED ORDER OF FINISH

NETHERLANDS
DENMARK
CAMEROON
JAPAN

Netherlands could win this group with their "C" team. Not so much because of their superior talent (though there's that), but because the other teams are reeling, having managed to muster just two wins between the three of them in March-May World Cup tuneups. Japan especially is in dreadful form, and Samuel Eto'o is unhappy with his Cameroonian bosses, so Denmark gets the nod for second.

GROUP F PREDICTED ORDER OF FINISH

PARAGUAY
ITALY
NEW ZEALAND
SLOVAKIA

This is actually a pretty tough group, with two European group winners and two other teams punching above their weight. Expect a lot ties. I mean, draws. Paraguay finished tied for second in South American qualifying, just a point behind Brazil. New Zealand has beaten Serbia and came within a second of drawing with Australia in Australia.

GROUP G PREDICTED ORDER OF FINISH

BRAZIL
PORTUGAL
IVORY COAST
NORTH KOREA

This has been hailed by the media as "The Group of Death," and rightly so. Brazil vs. Portugal is the best first round matchup on the docket, besides the whole Brasilia vs. The Motherland angle. Ivory Coast has the best player in Africa, Didier Drogba, and are a sexy upset pick. Even North Korea has strung together some decent tuneup results.

GROUP H PREDICTED ORDER OF FINISH

SPAIN
CHILE
SWITZERLAND
HONDURAS

The Swiss team might want to take some Spanish lessons. Spain is the clear favorite here, but Chile is the team Paraguay tied with as the South American runnerup. Switzerland is a pace behind, but will push Chile for second place. Honduras may not get a point out of this group.

ROUND OF 16 PREDICTIONS

Uruguay over South Korea
Mexico over Nigeria
Germany over Slovenia
England over Serbia
Paraguay over Denmark
Netherlands over Italy
Spain over Portugal
Brazil over Chile

QUARTERFINALS PREDICTIONS

England over Uruguay
Netherlands over Brazil
Germany over Mexico
Spain over Paraguay

SEMIFINALS PREDICTIONS

Netherlands over England
Germany over Spain

FINALS PREDICTION

Germany over Netherlands

Comments and Conversation

June 3, 2010

Anna Lucia:

What do you mean “Mexico is once again coached by a Mexican?” Que? Just what do you mean by that? It’s obvious you do not know what you are talking about when it comes to soccer, mi hijo, so why don’t you take some lessons, si?

Other than that…..I like how you called the group G the “group of Death” because it includes North Korea. Very appropriate. They should be sanctioned against playing after what they did in the ocean.

Scoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooore!!!!!!

June 4, 2010

Brad Oremland:

Anna Lucia, mi locacita, the current coach of the Mexican national team is Javier Aguirre, who is, as Kevin noted, Mexican. He replaced Sven-Göran Eriksson, who is not Mexican. I know a reputable pharmacist you can see in lieu of that guy who hangs out down the street. Cray-cray.

Kevin, Argentina out after the first round?

June 4, 2010

Luke Broadbent:

Germany to win? I can’t see them getting past the quarter-finals without Michael Ballack.

I agree with you when you tip the US to not get through the group. Slovenia are a very good side.

I think Serbia will get further than the second round. I woud have them as the dark horses because of their tight defence.

June 5, 2010

Kevin Beane:

Watch it Brad. Anna Lucia is my girlfriend and Cray Cray is a fine man.

Luke, I forgot about the Ballack injury. Shit. Can I do takebacks?

June 5, 2010

Mert Ertunga:

Brad, that’s too funny :)

I agree with most of Kevin’s predictions, our big difference is group E. I don’t believe Netherlands has an easy group, in fact I think it will be a struggle. March-May tuen-ups are just that: tune-ups; ie matches that players use to find form and don’t care if the scoreboard is not on their side at the end of the 90 minutes game.

I also don’t see Uruguay maek it out of group A. I have them last in that group.

it should be fun
Mert

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