I watched the NBA draft lottery two weeks ago and laughed. I laughed at the whole format of the draft lottery with random acquaintances of each and every organization who weren't quite good enough to reach the round of 16 sit in a single file row similar to my high school physics class, holding every sort of superstitious object that would surely gain them the ultimately desired number one pick in the upcoming draft.
I laughed at the Los Angeles Clippers, who won the draft lottery on May 19th, and will inevitably screw it up again, like usual. I laughed at the art of drawing lottery balls as if the people involved are playing some sort of NBA bingo in the TNT studio. And finally, I laughed as the so-called NBA experts immediately put up their personal mock drafts 10 minutes after the order was announced acting as if they were the reincarnation of Confucius. You may be asking yourself right now, what the hell does this kid find so funny? Well, let me explain.
When I look at the NBA, I see everything that is wrong in professional sports today. Granted, I love the playoffs, but that just gives me more of a reason to hate the regular season. I'm sure I am not the only one who can say the playoffs were the first time all year I watched a complete NBA game. Defense, for the most part, is optional and many players, including stars such as Kobe Bryant, have been calling for the shortening of the regular season. That just adds another reason not to flip the channel to an NBA game before playoff time unless for the occasional LeBron/Kobe or Dwight Howard/Shaq duel.
And the playoffs aren't flawless, either. The officiating is awful for the most part — how many calls has LeBron not gotten? And worse yet, these referees are calling technical and flagrant fouls like it's going out of style. In Game 5 of the Orlando/Cleveland series, Wally Szczerbiak gave what only can be classified as a love tap to Dwight Howard and was called for the flagrant. Sure, it sends a message to the players telling them to shut up and play the game, but don't we need that fire sometimes? What non-Rocket fan didn't love Derek Fisher laying out Louis Scola?
This is why I laugh at the NBA draft lottery, and the NBA draft itself. In college ball, I feel a connection with the players. I see them fight every night during conference play knowing that one loss could affect seeding in upcoming conference or NCAA tournaments. By the time they reach the NBA, I lose touch with these same players I made a connection with just a year ago. Be honest, how many O.J. Mayo games did you watch this year?
The NBA draft is in a word, stupid. I watch the draft for the same reason I watch Comedy Central. I sit there as these Stump the Schwab rejects proudly recite every last detail of each athlete in the draft like any of us care. Surprisingly, I think I would be able to fall asleep tonight not knowing Ricky Rubio's favorite color in the rainbow is violet. Then, as each player is announced, the viewers have the pleasure of watching the selected pick walk up to the stage, shake hands with David Stern, then watch the photographer struggle trying to get both participants in an obvious Kodak moment picture where the majority of picks make Stern look like a dwarf.
Worse yet, often the top picks go to West Coast teams who routinely tip off at 10 PM, meaning the only way I, being a proud member of the East Coast, will get to see a glimpse of recent top pick Kevin Durant and in all likelihood notice a Blake Griffin sighting is if I take a sick day the next morning.
Everyone has heard the phrase "if it ain't broke, don't fix it." Well, something here is broken, and I don't see a mechanic coming anytime soon.
That's why I stick to college ball. One can't argue with the talent comparison; obviously, the NBA has better talent. But as Mike DeCourcy of Sporting News said, "the difference is not with your eyes, but with your ears." Listen to the arenas of any prestigious college stadium during the game. People are screaming for their team like no other, and it comes from the heart. At an NBA game, the only crowd eruptions are either prompted from the selected chants from the overhead scoreboard, or caused by that fight between those two drunken fans in the upper level. And I won't even mention the monetary issues in the big leagues. Give me Duke/Carolina over any two NBA teams any day of the week.
And the March Madness thrill is amazing. Only in college basketball can you get a two-week, 65-team single elimination tournament where winning six consecutive games is the only way a champion is crowned.
The NBA playoffs are still exciting, and probably more realistic, but it takes away from that win or go home feeling every time you step out onto the court. Dear Orlando Magic, it is okay that Philly beat you in Game 1 on your home floor; we still have a spot waiting for you in the Finals. (Assuming Cleveland doesn't win three straight.)
So, I will sit at my TV and continue laughing. I will, however, watch the reminder of the NBA playoffs, but in the back of my mind I am counting down the months until the college basketball season tips off. Thank God I knew that Ricky Rubio's favorite color in the rainbow is violet, or I would be up all night.
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