ADHD Power Hour 5: It’s Hot Outside

Hello. It's hot, and it rains sometimes, especially when I'm in the pool, and the only sport on right now is baseball and my team stinks. Even my fantasy team stinks. Both of them. They stink.

But there are bright spots, too. The NBA draft is this week. The Celtics will pass on a future Hall of Fame point guard, and that will make me mad. We're a week closer to NFL training camps than we were at this time last week. And we don't live in the Gaza Strip. That's definitely a bonus.

So as I try to hold off on starting my fantasy football draft prep (can't risk burnout), here are some thoughts on the current state of affairs:

19. There are a lot of NBA mock drafts. I'll just say this:

Kevin Durant is better.

Mike Conley will be better than Corey Brewer, Al Horford, or Joakim Noah.

There are going to be a lot of really good players chosen in the second round.

18. I love the fact that Mike Golic and Mike Greenberg are going to get to call a "Monday Night Football" game (Arizona/San Francisco, September 10, ESPN).

I hate the fact Mike Ditka is going to ruin it.

17. Note from the World Bowl half-time show: has Meat Loaf always looked this much like Jerry Lewis?

16. Brilliant move by Joe Girardi turning down the Orioles. This is just like Sean Payton turning down Al Davis and the Raiders before getting the Saints job. Wait for your pitch, Joe.

15. Scary news courtesy Andy Katz: USC's Taj Gibson has already added 16 pounds of muscle since last season. If this O.J. Mayo kid is legit (talent and ability to play the college game, including defense, within a team concept), the Trojans could be contenders for April basketball.

14. Speaking of April basketball, Tennessee just got a huge boost on Friday when the NCAA granted a hardship waiver to former Iowa forward Tyler Smith, making him eligible to play this year. Smith, who is from Tennessee, averaged 15 ppg last year as a freshman and was going to be the man for the Hawkeyes this season with the departure of Adam Haluska, but wanted to be closer to his father, who has lung cancer, and his baby son.

13. The Vols were already SEC favorites. Now they're Final Four favorites.

12. You know who's had a bad offseason? The Cincinnati Bengals. And it doesn't have anything to do with their status as poster boys for the league's new discipline policy. Vastly underrated center Rich Braham got hurt early last year, and the average per rush was down by half a yard. The rush yards per game were down by about 20. Their time of possession was down by more than two minutes per game.

Perhaps all that isn't the direct result of Braham's injury and the inconsistency of his replacement, Eric Ghiaciuc, a 2004 fourth-rounder from Central Michigan with one start to his name prior to last season. But now Eric Steinbach has gone to Cleveland for crazy cash, and all Cincinnati has done to replenish the cupboard is re-sign restricted free agent Stacy Andrews and draft Dan Santucci of Notre Dame in the seventh round.

Also, Carson Palmer does hot dog commercials.

11. So much for the "at least he's never been charged" argument for Pacman Jones. Guy has himself a one-way ticket to Lawrence Phillipsville.

10. Download of the Day: Miles Behind, Medeski Scofield Martin & Wood

9. Letters From Iwo Jima is ten times the movie as Flags of Our Fathers. Maybe twenty.

(And I liked Flags. But Letters is a top-five all-timer.)

8. I'm just going to go ahead and say it: screw space stations.

7. Tiger Woods' baby has already made more money than I ever will.

6. Fred Thompson has the perfect blend of local folksy and elderly statesman, with the southern (but not too southern) gentleman finish. It feels like he's the first adult to get in the race, like everybody else is running for senior class president and he's running for leader of the free world. If he gets into the race, and I'd put the chances at about 90 percent now that he's started up the exploratory committee, he is going to walk to the nomination.

5. Of all the places I wish I could be right now, the Gaza Strip is ahead of very few places. Definitely bottom 10. Bad deal.

4. The Colts got their rings on a sliver platter. And who did they get to host the fancy affair? Sinbad. That's right. Sinbad.

3. This year's baseball trade market is going to be the most influential in years. Only the AL East and West look like possible run-away divisions. The other four are ripe for the taking by any one of a dozen teams who has the brain and the gonads to go out and take it.

2. Jack Del Rio needs to get rid of Mike Tice before he actually talks him into the Jaguars signing Daunte Culpepper. If they bring him in, they will be forced to at some point give him a chance. Everybody will know it, including starter Byron Leftwich. And as soon as the offense puts up a clunker, reporters, columnists, and radio voices will start hammering the question. "When will the change be made?" "What the hell is taking so god damned long?" The team will split. And no matter who takes over, the season will fall apart. This kind of situation never works, and it won't here, either.

Also, they shouldn't have released Donovan Darius. He's going to end up being a big get for somebody.

1. God, I can't wait for training camps.

Seth Doria is a writer in St. Louis. Several of the notes above are from his blog, The Left Calf. It's okay, though, because they were new to you.