Sports Q&A: Leinart! Dancing! A+!

Fred from Omaha, Nebraska writes, "USC quarterback Matt Leinart is taking only one class this semester, ballroom dancing. Should college athletes be able to take such an extremely light course load?"

No matter how you look at it, Leinart is still matriculating. He's a fifth-year senior, and has done the requisite course load to allow himself to take a single class in the fall semester. Besides, Leinart needs the class to complete his degree in sociology. And isn't that what college is all about: completing your degree? Well, maybe for most of the humanoids digging themselves a giant hole of debt for a fancy piece of paper with some Latin scribble on it. For the All-American QB BMOC, it's all about winning football games and the national championship.

I know, you're asking yourself, "Gosh, with Leinart devoting a minimum of 60 hours a week to football and football related endeavors, how can he find the time to keep up with the grueling ballroom dancing curriculum?" I'll tell you: tutors, and hot ones at that. I'm sure that every time Leinart goes to ballroom study hall on Tuesday nights, he will be schooled by a gorgeous dance major just itching to trip the light fantastic with the soon-to-be rich Leinart. Studying will be a breeze. Heck, he's probably taking it pass-fail anyway. It's only appropriate that the number one pick in next year's NFL draft will grade a "pass" when the semester ends sometime in mid-December.

Kudos to Leinart's academic advisor for recognizing that Leinart needed one final elective to qualify for his degree. And the advisor didn't even encourage Leinart to take it easy and enroll in the mother of all electives, Leisure Studies 101. That advisor did his/her job and "advised" Leinart to take ballroom dancing.

Not only was the advisor looking out for Leinart's academic well-being, he/she also had his football interests in mind. After all, what is quarterbacking? Mostly footwork. Anybody can thread the needle with a 60-yard spiral, but who can master the three-, five-, seven-, nine-, 11, thirteen, and 15-step drops, as well as the leg kick to signal a reveiver to go in motion? Probably no one, except for the college quarterback with the crucial two credit hours of ballroom dancing. That would be Heismann Trophy candidate Matt Leinart. And speaking of the Heismann, Leinart, with a semester of ballroom dancing under his belt, will find striking that Heisman pose much easier.

Even if Leinart is the next Ryan Leaf and is the biggest quarterback failure ever, then he can still fall back on his newly-acquired dancing talent. If you're a failed athlete and/or a Hollywood reject, then you may have a future in the reality television market, particularly in network swill like "Dancing With the Stars" or other crappy knockoffs that are soon to emerge. Check Leaf's academic transcript, and I guarantee you won't find any ballroom dancing credit hours. In fact, you may not find any credit hours period on Leaf's docket.

Anyway, Leinart is well within reason to take ballroom dancing. A lot of college students take six years to graduate, and they're not even athletes. Leinart needs one class to graduate — if USC offered credit to roam the quad and chat up freshmen hotties, he should be able to take that, should he so chose. After he's busted his tail for the last four years, he should have the right to cruise to his degree.

Tom from Iron Mountain, Michigan asks, "What starting NFL quarterback is likely to be the first benched for bad play?"

Isn't the answer to this question every year "Joey Harrington?" This is Harrington's year to come out of his shell (that's assuming a "shell" is shielding him from greatness; maybe he just sucks) and prove to everyone that the Lions made a wise choice by drafting him number three in 2002. It seems that everyone is in agreement that if Harrington can't impress with offensive talent like Kevin Jones at running back, Roy Williams, Charles Rogers, and Mike Williams as wide receivers, and Marcus Pollard at tight end, then his days as a starter are done.

With Jeff Garcia's broken leg suffered September 2nd, Coach Mariucci may be less reluctant to pull Harrington in favor of back-up Dan Orlovsky. Harrington may have no choice but to step up. But it won't be easy. Week 1 at home against Green Bay would seem to be a good matchup for Harrington. The Packers were in the bottom 10 in passing defense last year. However, they apparently had Harrington's number, as he only threw for 148 yards, one touchdown, and one interception, in two games. That might keep your job if you're QB'ing your eighth-grade team that passes five times a game, but not in the NFL. If he can't impress against Green Bay, he may have even more trouble in the upcoming weeks.

After a week two visit to Chicago, Detroit has a bye, then travels to Tampa Bay, then hosts the Ravens and Panthers in consecutive weeks. Ouch! A gauntlet of very good defensive teams, all intent on making piano playing Harrington's full-time hobby. Unless Harrington starts 2005 as the league's most improved player, he could be sitting early, and likely be mentioned in the same breath as other Lion QB failures (Chuck Long, Scott Mitchell, etc.).

Another quarterback with something to prove is Arizona's Kurt Warner. Unlike Harrington, Warner has proven himself before (Super Bowl and NFL MVP), but has come nowhere near regaining that form. His last attempt to recapture glory ended with being benched in favor of rookie Eli Manning last year in New York. This year, Warner takes over for the Cardinals, and, like Harrington, is surrounded by young talent, with receivers Anquan Boldin, Larry Fitzgerald, and Bryant Johnson, as well as rookie running back J. J. Arrington. Coach Dennis Green is probably not expecting Warner to put up huge numbers, but is likely expecting him to minimize mistakes and protect the ball.

The Cardinals, when they won last year, often won with defense, and the last thing a good defense needs is an error-prone quarterback. If Warner breaks his thumb, fumbles, or throws interceptions uncontrollably, or has his play affected when his goofy wife Brenda flips her wig, then Green will surely pull the plug on the latest Warner experiment and insert backup Josh McCown. I'm sure Warner will find another job — if not as a quarterback, then an experienced grocery bagger, where he will have plenty of time to ponder the word "fluke."

Other quarterbacks who could feel the yank are Gus Frerotte in Miami, and whomever starts in Chicago.

Sports Q&A will take a brief hiatus due to the start of the NFL season. Don't miss my NFL weekly predictions beginning Tuesday, September 6th. Sports Q&A will return with a vengeance on Friday, December 2nd.