Have you ever been reading a sports article and suddenly had to throw it down, as your view on its premise was so grossly contrasting with the author's you simply could take no more? Have you ever had to avert your eyes from the monitor as an online column's contents were so inane and unrealistic that even a disconcerted sigh or well-placed profanity couldn't aptly describe the anguish it caused?
Here's to hoping this isn't one of those articles.
Sports writing and reporting is, by nature, chock full of hyperbole, innuendo, and exaggerated reality. As a sports journalist, you know and accept this and even occasionally trifle in some literary grandeur of your own. After all, it would make no sense for any self-respecting sports pundit to preface his or her rants with a disclaimer pointing out the utter lack of big-picture importance associated to the subject with which he or she best relates (picture a Sports Illustrated cover shot of Michael Jordan's famous 1998 championship-winning jump shot with the caption "The Man, The Shot, Who Cares?" emblazoned upon it ... tends to take away from the story's impact now, doesn't it?).
Opinion in sports has long been a very real part of the apparatus. Heck, if it wasn't for opinion, I'd have nothing to write about and where would I be then? There are some opinions, however, that are better kept as introspective thoughts than as publicly exposed indignations. The root of the problem is, as usual, raw human nature. But there are other contributing factors — arrogance, ignorance, or poor judgment — that can further infuriate even the most avid fan.
If you have an organization which holds as its primary objective objectivity itself, then eventually the subjectivity that is very much a part of human nature will creep into the equation. Inevitably, the agendas of those atop the organization become more and more a part of the group's mission. This is the modus operandi for the United Nations, the New York Times, and any government-affiliated entity, and it even rings true within any of your preferred outlets for sports information.
For instance, in Houston, where my family and I currently make our daily bread, the Rockets, Astros, and Texans are king. Local media outlets, quite predictably, tend to look at all things sports through the eyes of these teams. This becomes the norm and the status quo remains as information is passed from the beat writers through the anchors to the public.
Inevitably, though, friendships are made and allegiances grow within the local sports scene. As these relationships blossom, a decided bias is added to the stories ... an angle that reflects, quite directly, an opinion or belief of one of the involved parties. This bias eliminates the aforementioned objectivity and, quite frankly, can turn a person against any player, team or institution. Nobody likes to be presented something as truth that is not backed up by any factual information — human nature tends to put up the defenses in these instances and generally a person creates an equally unrealistic view toward the opposite extreme (i.e. "Jeff Bagwell is the greatest first baseman to ever live" might be countered with "Jeff Bagwell is the worst first baseman to ever live," both of which are gross misstatements).
This may explain my extreme prejudice against the Atlanta Hawks, Houston Astros, and Dallas Cowboys, each of my dear brother's favorite sports teams, but that's a story for another day.
While there is no place for this atop our media outlets, it is what it is and we accept it, on the whole. Local media is about local teams, local traditions, and local interests, so you have to accept that if you live in Los Angeles, you're going to be inundated with Laker-mania. Thus, these media outlets get a free pass this time around — their ignorance to the real point of their duties notwithstanding.
The depth of ignorance accompanying any exaggerated claim of brilliance varies. As I've written previously in this very web space, Dan Dierdorf is a famed for his over-valuing of talent during his Sunday afternoon telecasts of the NFL. It seems anyone and everyone that makes an above-average play is deigned to be a Hall-of-Famer in waiting. This, though, is a rather innocuous example of my storyline, as Dan means no harm and is only trying to fill airtime with what little independent thought he can muster. This is, after all, a man who is on record saying, "If I do the right thing right, I'm going to succeed." Thanks, Captain Obvious.
You have the more unsettling infractions. These are the ordinary folks who just plain get carried away by their pride and passion and turn off that filter that usually resides between the brain and the mouth whenever talking about sports. For lack of a better term, I generally call these individuals "Cowboy fans" — but so as not to cause too much anti-me outrage in the world of the Big Silver Star (I do live in Texas, after all), let's just say these are unusually overzealous fans.
This type will call the radio talk shows and tell us all how there is an anti-Dallas bias with the Pro Football Hall of Fame voting, how they can't believe how underrated Tom Brady is as a quarterback or how Kobe Bryant is clearly the greatest basketball player of our generation. Now, as aggravating as it is for me to cruise down the traffic-saturated Houston freeways listening to Bernie Beergut talk about how Morgan Ensberg doesn't get the credit he deserves as the best third bagger in baseball, this type of sports commentary is certainly excusable. After all, even I'm guilty of occasionally putting a positive and vastly unrealistic spin on my beloved Cubbies' chances for that elusive championship pennant.
The real egregious perpetrators of the "Fraud Squad," and those to whom my distaste is most genuinely directed, are those supposedly neutral twits on the major cable channels (ESPN, NFL on CBS and FOX, NBA on TNT and ABC, etc ... ) that, despite their contractual obligation to report fair and balanced sports stories, can't help but interject their own noxious opinions.
There was Bill Walton and his recent public cry for replacing a coach under contract (Jeff Van Gundy) with a dear friend and former teacher to his favorite son (Phil Jackson, who coached, and actually gave a little playing time, to Bill's son Luke). This is not only a pathetic display of grandstanding that is clearly unethical, it should get Walton's overbearing and tree-hugging self a pink slip.
There's the often inflammatory Steven A. Smith and his assertion that Larry Bird was overrated because of his blatant whiteness (he actually stated that Juwan Howard — JUWAN freaking HOWARD — is every bit the player Larry Legend was). I don't even know where to begin with this one, but for starters, Larry Bird was arguably the most dominant small forward/power forward hybrid to ever play the game. Juwon Howard is a career underachiever who, while very solid, was never a team's first option, most notably in "crunch time," which, coincidentally, is when Bird thrived. Not to mention reversing such innuendo cost folks like Jimmy the Greek and Rush Limbaugh their jobs.
There's the unique Dick Vitale and his never-ending mission to afford NCAA coaches much more credit than they deserve. Dicky V never met a college hoops coach he didn't like, and will tell you just that every chance he gets. I swear, he must publicly trade Mike Krzyzewski stock and likely is majority owner. Seriously, we all appreciate the efforts of these coaches to guide our nation's youthful athletes — but they know this because they get paid large sums of money to do what they do. No need to further canonize them or to bestow sainthood upon them. Without Duke's rep, Coach K is just another good teacher toiling in anonymity. Appreciate him for that, not for his knack for recruiting kids who can nail fade-away jumpers with a hand in their face.
I could spend another four hundred lines or so disproving many of our favorites, but I think you get the point. Sport isn't supposed to be about the opinions of those men who talk about them. Sport is about competition and passion and effort. We are taught to be humble in victory and gracious in defeat. We learn the importance of fundamentals, teamwork and determination.
Bill, Steven, Dick, et al — we don't really need your opinions. We know that Phil Jackson can coach superstars, we know that Larry Bird was white, and we know that Coach K is a fine human. I'm not "hatin'", I just want my unbiased sports coverage back. Not to say there is no place for these bits of personal interjection from our nation's sports' experts — it's just that they shouldn't be jammed down my ears when all I really want to see is the game. Is there commentary on Mariska Hargitay's new hairdo as you watch the latest "Law and Order: SVU"? Nope. Then why do I need to hear about Charles Barkley's disturbing penchant for Tim Duncan during the NBA Finals?
There is a saying about opinions — they are much like one of the body's more fallible body parts — everyone has one, but nobody wants to hear yours.
In my opinion, those are words to live by.
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