Rules Don’t Apply In Bracketville

I stared at my bracket, crumpled and practically torn from all the erasing. It was Selection Sunday. I had time to make the picks. But I was panicking. Too much pressure. Too many competing voices in my head, all of them yelling louder than Stephen A. Smith. I needed help.

I needed inspiration. I needed a gust of wind to sneak into my room, pick me up, and carry me high into the heavens, to the Oracle of College Basketball.

Which is exactly what happened. Either that or I fell asleep. I don't remember. But this is more fun anyway. For me at least.

So I got to the Oracle. Nice little place. Looked a lot like the Wizard's abode in the Wizard of Oz. In fact, I had a sinking suspicion that if I looked behind the curtains, Digger Phelps would be there. But the Oracle spoke up before I could check.

"Who the heck are you?" the voice said.

"Just a college basketball fan," I said. "Need some help with my brackets."

"For the love of elevation, we all do."

"What are you talking about?"

"Sorry," the Oracle said. "Linda Cohn was in here earlier. She speaks only in dumb catchphrases. So what do you need?"

"I don't know," I said. "Maybe just some infallible rules for picking NCAA tournament games."

"Can do. I know everything."

"Sweet. Give 'em to me," I said.

"Rule number one," the Oracle said. "Always pick teams with a lot of seniors. Veterans are invaluable in the Big Dance."

I jotted it down.

"Rule number two. Teams with great point guards always win."

"Always?" I asked.

"Don't question me, chief."

"Sorry."

"And rule number three. Teams that have been there before have a distinct advantage."

"Anything else?"

"No, three should be enough. You'll win your pool, guaranteed."

"You better be right, Oracle. You better be right."

And that was that. I felt wise. I felt enlightened. I felt invincible. I picked Kansas to go far based on their senior leadership. I jumped on the Wake Forest bandwagon because of point guard Chris Paul. I fell in love with UConn because the Huskies won it all last year.

And now my bracket looks less than spectacular. Stupid oracle.

So much for the seniors. Kansas looked terrible in a first-round loss to Bucknell. Some point guards have done well. Not Paul. He imploded in double-overtime against West Virginia and so did his team. UConn might have been there before, but I guess they didn't see Julius Hodge last time.

In this struggle, I've learned a lesson that I learn every year, but always seem to forget. There are no infallible rules.

Talking heads will tell you everything the Oracle "told" me. Seniors matter. Great guard play matters. Tourney experience matters.

But the flip side is often just as strong. Young players feeling no pressure can do a lot. A dominant big man can mask deficiencies in the backcourt. Teams that have never been there before might fight even harder because they know they might not be back.

Basically, you can throw all the rules out the window when it comes to making NCAA tournament picks. Sometimes it's more about luck than skill. More about heart than experience. More about matchups between role players than superstars.

It's frustrating, especially when the people with no basketball knowledge win the pools because they think a Wildcat would eat a Cowboy.

But it's fun, too. March Madness would be pretty boring if everything that was supposed to happen happened.

So forget about your picks. Throw your brackets in the trash. The Oracle would tell you to sit back and enjoy the ride.